Friday, April 17, 2009

Language of Silence

While celling honey,
He dreams of Polynesia:
A new beginning.

As a kid I wanted to be a hair stylist, flight attendant, or nurse. Reality set in because I was allergic to chemical dyes, afraid of heights, and fainted at the sight of blood. You think I'm making this up? By the fourth grade I decided I would be an artist because I won first place in a contest at the Cranbrook Institute of Arts in Michigan. I had created a 4' X 3' mosaic of life beneath the sea. It was awesome. When I was in high school I worked as a darkroom assistant for a newspaper photographer. It was a riot. I loved every minute of it. Somewhere along the line I got sidetracked. I had taken one typing class in high school and somehow I parlayed it into a 25-year career.

Then I found out quite by accident, that I'm really good at analyzing and tearing things apart, probably from years of proofreading and editing. So I stumbled into the auditing field. No one grows up saying, "Mommy, I want to be an auditor someday." It is a field only the very anal and obsessive compulsive stumble into. I've heard this from all of the other auditors I know. I enjoy some things about my second career, like you see fast results, you don't have to supervise anyone else, and you work independently. Recently I had a choice between the unemployment line and a job as the tax man. I took the latter as the lesser of the two evils. Maybe I didn't think things through?

I start my new job in one week and I am already plotting my escape. Telling people they owe the government thousands of dollars doesn't sound like a good time to me. That's why I've decided to go back to school for an MBA. It'll take two years and keep me very busy - but I am hoping it will be worth it. One of my passions is teaching, and with an MBA maybe I can teach at a community college or a business school. I'm looking at two years of hard labor on the rock but I can do it. I have to keep on blogging too because of the encouragement I give and receive. I need it.

I posted once about trying to connect with my inner silence. I think I'm starting to do that but it's happening in a very unique way. I find myself finding my silence in nature. The haiku I wrote for this post is what I imagined the bee might be thinking if he found himself in a similar position as me. What would he think? What would he do? I watched Mr. Bee climb out of the center part of the rose onto the outside petal. His wings were flapping so fast I could barely see them. I found my silence in nature that day and was able to come to resolution for my situation. What is your language of silence?

By the way, do we like the normal size letters as in this post, or do we prefer the larger print?


Shadow said...

you are living your destiny. go to it! and good fun while you're doing it!

Auxiliary Girl said...

Hello Sister Pouty Lips,
I was thinking about the tax job. You seem to be looking at from the point of view that it will always be negative. Here is a possible the glass is half full view to consider.... 1) you stay employed and can retain your retirement benefits, health benefits, etc. 2) you are going to be doing work that utilizes your expertise in digging into details 3) you get to audit these tax documents and perhaps you find mistakes that go in the favor of the taxpayer. 4) you might actually help a few people avoid problems with the tax man if the gov't agency was wrong. 5) if you do find a mistake that benefits the tax payer and adjust the bill you could be changing the course of their life.

We have an argument going on with the State of Mass taxman, we know for 100% certain that they are wrong. So now we are in the appeal process. I wish we could have an eagle eyed person, like you, with a conscience, who could have figured it out and saved us the grief.

My suggestion is to see how it goes and then decide on the next course of action.

Pouty Lips said...

Shadow: Destiny is such a great word. If I had a daughter I might have named her that.

Sis: I think it's frowned upon to find mistakes in favor of the taxpayer.

I like your idea of chilling for a while and then re-assessing and going from there.

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Granny on the Web said...

Go for it Pouty. My daughter started studying to be a math teacher at the grand age of 44, and she had two children and a strained marriage. She studied hard and got her degree and now teaches math at a boy's grammar school. We are all so proud of her. Her children are up and flown the nest, she is divorced and in a new relationship and he presto, a new career! (I don't mean to infer you have to have a strained marriage and a divorce to get where you're going!!!)
Just meaning, go for whatever your dreams take you.

Good post
Love Granny

Hit 40 said...

I am impressed. No way do I want to take anymore classes! Had enough. Go for it!!!

I have taught at the college level. You will have the best grades in the class. The adults always do better than the young ones.

Woman in a Window said...

Clapping loudly! Good on you!

I look to the world, nature, the everyday for signs and revelations. They're all there to be seen, just have to look. So in a way, we choose our own resolutions. Yours is brilliant! Good luck.

Carver said...

Beautiful shot for this post. I enjoyed reading your goals and changes and about your new adventure. Best of luck. Thanks for your visit to my site and comment.

Anonymous said...

Beautiful picture. I find my silence in yoga, meditation and acupuncture. But nature is pretty good too!

'mommy I want to be an auditor' that's funny!

Sadly I grew up wanting to be a 'maid and a babysitter' and look what I am-I clean offices and I'm a nanny. yes, even after getting a dual cert bachelors degree! I guess your true calling will always prevail!

Babooshka said...

Interesting reading and the image just so pefrect with it.